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Free Association Friday: Vodka Mom!

    Welcome back to my summer feature–Free Association Friday. Today I have the honor of hosting Kindergarten Teacher-turned-Blogging-Sensation Vodka Mom! (cheers from all of the muppets, as Kermit-the-frog gestures wildly, and curtains draw open…) I provided the words in bold below, and Ms. Vodka summoned her mojo for the rest. Enjoy! Wisenheimer – The kid who sat beside you in fourth grade that is now at MIT. With his twin brother. On a scholarship. The Wisenheimer Scholarship. Farfenugan – The first name of Wisenheimer’s twin brother. D’nealian – The other Wisenheimer’s first name. Basil E. Frankweiler… Read More »Free Association Friday: Vodka Mom!

    Christopher Guest? Let’s Go to BlogHer!

      Dear Christopher Guest, I’m a huge fan of your mockumentaries. By “huge fan” I don’t mean I can quote verbatim or extensively. However, I can quote partially, incorrectly, and enthusiastically. A mere mention of oh let’s say Best In Show or Waiting for Guffman, can send my father and I giggling into a fit of misquotes. I can sing quite a few of the songs…from Listen, shhh, to what the flower people say, to Midnight at the Oasis and Teacher’s Pet with hand motions (OH, I’m THAT good, Mr. Guest) and most of the soundtrack… Read More »Christopher Guest? Let’s Go to BlogHer!

      ChuckECheese Exceededs All Expectations!

        (By TwoPointFive) I got to see Chuck E Cheese in real life and not just brought-to-you-by PBSkids. Freeloaders jumped on my Teletubbies ride. I gently kicked them off with my chubby feet. One girl hip-checked my Mom and I saw her go flying into Barney’s choo-choo. She smiled really hard and went to buy a large beer. I also got to see real-live Police. They came to settle-down some grown ups at the next table. Our birthday boy hid under the table when the staff started singing to him. He put his hands over his… Read More »ChuckECheese Exceededs All Expectations!

        Free Association Friday: CG Coppard

          Recently a guy named GC Coppard started leaving me hilarious comments on each post. Turns out he is also a talented writer. So naturally I recruited him for FAF. As usual, I came up the with words, and my guest freely associated. Enjoy, fellow FAFSTERS! Chamois – What the Sham-Wow pitch guy asked when they arrested him last month. Engoli – Svengali’s ineffectual cousin. Circus Peanut – A regular peanut with a red nose and unusual flexibility. Wanton – I’m not certain I’ve ever used this word properly in a sentence. Why start now? Won… Read More »Free Association Friday: CG Coppard

          The Toddlerazzi

            They arrive armed with multiple technology. Giving a smilenod while squeezing right past you, they jockey for position. With an unparalleled hunger for THAT MOMENT, they’ll head-and-shoulders your view before you can say customized-collage-coffee-cup. With such high-profile clients as Bubbe and Zaydee, Nana and Papa, or Grammie and Gramps, even the semi-sane adults start to cave under pressure. Over here, not there, here. HERE! SMILE, put down your dress. OH SHIT the flash, NNNNNooo I said “Well tip my hat!” I always say that “Well TIP my HAT.” Get your finger OUT OF THERE!! Cheese.… Read More »The Toddlerazzi

            Hi, I’m Ann. LOL. U Rawk. ILVU4URAQT.

              From now until Blogher, I’m considering a simple mental Rolodex system for my comments. I plan to visualize your blog and my comment, commit it to memory, and then scroll through my brain to retrieve and deliver the comment directly to you at Blogher. [doodaloo doodaloo doodaloo flash forward] Hi, I’m Patty of Patty Cake Patty Cake, Baker’s BlogHi, I’m Ann. This comment was removed by author Hi, I’m Bwana of Bloggers love BwanaHi, I’m Ann. Eggs, Bread, Yogos…shit, sorry Bwana, that’s my grocery list…er, um, UR Bwanariffic! Hi, I’m Jane from Hottest Mommy In… Read More »Hi, I’m Ann. LOL. U Rawk. ILVU4URAQT.

              Free Association Friday: Commentor’s Choice

                Welcome to FAF: Commentor’s Choice Edition! Thanks to all of my commentor contributors! I took at least one word from each comment. Sorry if you didn’t get a chance to comment, but I went to bed early. You guys rock for playing along, by the way. Here goes…I’ll try not to spit all over the microphone. Floccinaucinhilipilification: Damn that html code. Lamprophony: Technical patent for “The Clapper” Indubidly: Indubidly Delicious! (anyone?) Skymall: Godshop Infarction: Gesundheit Gazetteer: One of those kids from “Newsies” Corpuscle: Enormous zit.Tetrahedron: 84 ounce latteKohlrabi: Wolfgang Puck’s Peekapoo Peace-Rene: Celine’s next single… Read More »Free Association Friday: Commentor’s Choice

                Commentor’s Choice for Free Association Friday

                  More of me…How ’bout some more of me-ee.Hey everybody, let’s bloggety-blogenshtein! Leave a word for me to free-associate with in today’s comments and I will be YOUR guest for FAF tomorrow. have mercy…

                  Doradoradora, Can’t Ignore Ya

                    Shush, Dora, Shush. Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. No no, Mami, your voice far exceeds levels appropriate for non-drinking hours. I understand your excitement, for you speak two languages–DOS LENGUAS. And my if you aren’t fluent in the language of LOUD. Are limited gestures inversely proportionate to decibels? Like an infant, you can’t even clear your head with your arms fully extended. Not everyone with limited motion shouts though, do they? Do they, Mi’ja. What a journey you have before you: OVER the BRIDGE, THROUGH the FOREST, and TO THE TOP OF LA MONTANA! But my Cool Ranch Dorita,… Read More »Doradoradora, Can’t Ignore Ya

                    Upon Your Maiden Bridesmaidhood: Considerations for Young Women

                      I wrote this post for FunnyNotSlutty’s wedding theme this month. If you see html coding in the text below, please click over to FNS and read it over there. I tried something different to avoid the issue…we’ll see if it worked. You should go over to FNS anyway, and read Rene of Not The Rockefeller’s terrific post “Unbridled Apathy.” Hey, and why not join while you’re over there? Upon Your Maiden Bridesmaidhood: Considerations for Young Women: Young women, before offering your Bridesmaidhood, please carefully consider the following: When The drunken Fiancees proposition you at a… Read More »Upon Your Maiden Bridesmaidhood: Considerations for Young Women