Note: If you did not watch The Cosby Show religiously, skip this and click over to my newest column at Aiming Low: Screen Limit Psycho.
Three is not a magic number when it comes to my pig tails.
Who is this Sondra and what Daddy did she come from?
Just saw Angelheart. Hillman college sure is A Different World Denise. Guess now I get your room AND your inheritance FTW!
Welcome to the family, Olivia. AND welcome to the world of being upstaged by a cuter child, Rudy! FACE.
Cockroach is staying overnight again. In “Theo’s” room. 
Dear Father, stop spending my college tuition on Hogies and $500 sweaters.
Sondra’s husband is named Elvin, and now I’m supposed to marry some old dude named Dabnis. Well played hostile writers, well played.
Please be my 2000th facebook fan! Robert has 5000 and he’s not even a regular. Peter has 10,000 and he can’t even read. Denise has 2 million because she makes naughty movies where she swings a dead chicken over her head.
I jussss drank burrbon wit suzzzan. Where Cockrrrroach? I meaned RRRRobert. HA HA HA HA shhhhhh (oooppsay).
If I have to do one more of these Ray Charles or James Brown routines, I’m going to go Till Tuesday on someone’s ass.
Guess what everybody? Denise was wasted and crashed Dad’s car into Stevie Wonder and to teach us a lesson he invited us to a recording session!
Goodbye Cockroach. Hellllllllllllllo Smitty…
This is so weird – last week during Oliver’s MRI I was stuck in a waiting room watching some VH-1 top 100 shows and it was all about “cutest child stars.” Both Rudy and Olivia made the list. Unsurprisingly, Vanessa did not. And she doesn’t even have a “Marcia, Marcia, Marcia!” line to fall back on.
I like to imagine Vanessa and Tootie from the Facts of Life as superhero partners, kind of like the Wonder Twins. Their rad ponytails are the keys to their power. Tootie uses hers as whips. Vanessa’s are elastic and controllable. I need a hobby.
Oh snap! My sister and I used to call Vanessa “The Ugly Cosby” which is just the rudest thing to say about someone. Unless it’s true. And my sister? She actually looked JUST LIKE Rudy – they were both in the pigtails stages at the same time… people used to remark on it all the time… then they’d look to me, and wonder if I was The Vanessa… “No, no!! I’m DENISE, yo.”
And then she went and married Lenny Kravitz. Some tv stars get everything delicious, I tell you. (But not so much with Vanessa, huh?)
Loved this post, lady. Hee!!
Wow, there is space being taken up in your brain with Cosby trivia…
GLOSSING OVER IT
My husband still claims he saw Tootie & Natalie driving an Impala on the 101 freeway one time.
Which has nothing to do with your funny post.
I loved the Cosby’s. I’d forgotten about DABNIS. Great line about the “hostile writers.” GREAT LINE.
Do you ever watch “Community” on NBC? Theo has returned to the small screen as Shirley’s husband.
How DID you EVEN think of this?
The lines about Angelheart and the scenes in it killed me.
It’s all true..
Your brain is a magical place.
Ann…you slay me. Goodnight ‘Nessa and Dabnis spelled backward is Sinbad.
OMG. Too much. I never missed an episode of that show. Chug a lug!
Steph
Reason # 1 KAJILLION that you are awesome! Love this!
I’m kinda regretting that I never watched that show all of a sudden.
Especially since Adam Sandler was in it.
You never fail to amuse me. Never. Genius you are.
Oh My!!! I guess I totally missed that Adam Sandler was even on that show!
Wow!
Yess! Theo now on ‘Community’!!
Rudy next? That was hilarious!
::banging head against wall in anguish::
I stopped watching before Dabnis, Adam (who was born and raised in my home state which is probably why he’s so odd and strangely amusing) Sandler, or Stevie Wonder showed up.
::oh the awesome I missed::
since Ryan is out of town I’ll have to email him this post rather than read it loud. He was the biggest Cosby fan ever and still loves to watch reruns for the making of the fun. This post can’t be missed. 🙂
I loved it too, of course. Just saying.
can i borrow your brain for a couple (hundred) posts??
I laughed out loud at the title and at nearly every item within. And just to make you super-duper jealous, I know Elvin personally. He’s married to one of my best friends. In real life, you know. Uh… what’s that?
Dude, you need to stop watching Nick at Night.
Also? Dusty Earth Mother is so flippin’ cool.
Ha! I LOVED that you brought up Vanessa Huxtable and Cockroach. This was hilarious!
Isn’t Vanessa the one hosting Clean House now?
This totally made me giggle out loud…or GOL I suppose…
Denise really was just….blerg. That is all.
that used to be my favorite show. I kid you not.
What this all proves is what we all knew at the time – that Clair Huxtable was the perfect mother. See, pre-teen Vanessa should have hated her mother at that age..and did Clair even get a mention on FB? No. See, perfect.
I so wish Clair was my mom…
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The Cosby Show – Proof that with enough money, your kids can be anything they want to be!
Juuuust kidding. I’ve seen every episode many, many times. Mrs. H was always my favorite. She never took any shit… ever.
Cheers,
Casey
(((I wrote Crosby the first time!)))
Funny!!
I loved the Cosby Show. Sometimes I’ll still watch re-runs when they turn up on my TV. Cockroach. Come on!
WHO is still thinking about the Cosby Show? Oh you. Funny girl.
Wow. You totally go inside Vanessa’s head. Which reminded me of my head. If I lived in that cool row house and had a gyno dad with lots of sweaters.
One of my dear friends is best friends with Rudy. I’ve met her and it seriously messes with my equilibrium.
Just the name ‘Theo’ makes me laugh every time.
Okay I remember Sondra, Denise, Theo, Rudy … I think I know which one Vanessa is, but who’s Olivia?
This was hilarious. Poor Vanessa… she was such a classic middle child.
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