humor

We used to have movie night now we have MOVIENITE

You’re Invited to a First-Person Four-Player Experience Called Movienite! Who: You and your older brother. What: Let’s All Stare at the Same Screen at the Same Time. When: Tonight. Movienite. Let’s get it! Where: The Elysian Fields of XBox Sweat, aka the basement sectional, aka the teen boy bassinet where you spend more hours than your actual bed. Wear: Two-sizes too small Old Navy gym shorts, and no bath for three days. To unlock “ultimate comfort mode” kick off your shorts. Shorts are total trash, bro! Toss the cat around your neck like a pashmina.… Read More »We used to have movie night now we have MOVIENITE

5 signs it’s Sunday of a holiday weekend

The couch isn’t quite close enough to the dining room table. Buddy, my DIL (dog in law) 2. Out of a deck of 44 goddess oracle cards you choose Cordelia whose messages states “You have been indoors too long. Go outside and get some fresh air.” 3. You need a quick snooze immediately following your nap. 4. After a meal you need a dessert. After dessert you look for a snack. After a snack your eyes scan the room for candy dishes just to play it safe. 5. You hear Demogorgon sounds coming… Read More »5 signs it’s Sunday of a holiday weekend

My kids are genuine helpers now, not fake helpers-in-training

As part of their #WhatULuv campaign, the folks at Luvs asked me about what I truly value and feel thankful for as a parent. The following immediately came to mind: My 9 and 12-year-old are now genuine helpers–with the capability of actual helpfulness–instead of fake helpers-in-training. For instance: My kids now empty the dishwasher and put away the dishes, instead of emptying the dishwasher and leaving everything on the counter they “can’t reach.” I called them out on the “can’t reach” counter when they could rest their elbows for prolonged emptying-the-dishwasher breaks in the very cupboard where the… Read More »My kids are genuine helpers now, not fake helpers-in-training