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Doradoradora, Can’t Ignore Ya

    Shush, Dora, Shush.

    Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

    No no, Mami, your voice far exceeds levels appropriate for non-drinking hours.

    I understand your excitement, for you speak two languages–DOS LENGUAS. And my if you aren’t fluent in the language of LOUD.

    Are limited gestures inversely proportionate to decibels? Like an infant, you can’t even clear your head with your arms fully extended. Not everyone with limited motion shouts though, do they? Do they, Mi’ja.

    What a journey you have before you: OVER the BRIDGE, THROUGH the FOREST, and TO THE TOP OF LA MONTANA!

    But my Cool Ranch Dorita, I must prepare for my own adventure: DRINK two pints of COFFEE, TAKE a PEE, and WRANGLE MIS NINOS!

    If you could callate la boca por un momentito I won’t need los ibuprofen-itos.

    Be a good girl and I’ll spring for a round of margaritas for you, Backpack, Boots, and hell Swiper too. Eh, hermana? Let that hair down a little. It looks heavy. Next time tell your Chica to use the thinning shears. Does wonders for me.

    So c’mon vamanos, everybody let’s shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhht!

    xoxoxoxo55555555xoxoxoxoco555555xoxoxoxo

    Thanks to F8hasit for the Kreativ Blogger Award. A new bloggy friend, with a great writing-style, go check her out. But watch out for the midges…

    p.s. I wrote this one in blog reader, dammit. Code? Anyone see HTML Code? Why I oughtta…

    0 thoughts on “Doradoradora, Can’t Ignore Ya”

    3. G. Coppard

      Oh, Dora. Do they still have Wonderpets? Have yourself a couple of shots and chill to those singing rodents. That’ll do ya. I’m a Spongebob guy myself. I even have Patrick and Sponge Beanies in my windshield. No, really. 🙂

      This is what is at the bottom of your post:
      xoxoxoxo55555555xoxoxoxoco555555xoxoxoxo

      Either weird code, or an infatuation with the number “5”?

    4. ladyfi

      No code – unless it’s the secret language of Dora the Explorer and Backpack…

      Oh – and don’t forget SWIPER – must be said very very loudly…

    5. Frau

      Thank god my child was too old for the Dora series Barney was bad enough. I still catch myself humming A Barney tune every now and than.

    6. Not The Rockefellers

      Hick Boom Ohhhhhhhhhhh!!!

      Did I ever tell you the story of my 90 year mother-in-law who called my husband to tell him that a little spanish girl keeps yelling at her from the television?

      Ayuda Me!

      Mystery solved…

      Peace -Rene

    7. Douglas

      I am so glad there was only Sesame Street when my son was a wee little one (now he is a 38 year old with two ninas of his own who outshout the TV and hog the Wii).

    9. Missy

      So with ya on Dora. She was alright the first year. Fun even, but 5 freaking years of Dora gives me cause to avoid flipping to her channel when I suspect she might be on. I am equally annoyed with Diego.

    10. hokgardner`

      My friend refers to his son’s loud voice as Dora Speak and blames the high volume of all kids’ voices on her. She does indeed yell all the time.

      We avoid her, too.

    11. Rachel

      Did you know Dora’s last name was Marquez? I just found this out recently…

      I got lucky that my oldest was never a fan of Dora (“She’s too bossy, Mom, she keeps telling me to do stuff I don’t wanna do!”), but my current 3 year old is infatuated… I have learned to tune out….

      Also, I see the xo5s, too.

    17. stepalicious

      Ahem…you are not allowed to mention Dora around me. Thanks to you and since my little purse swap…I am not able to talk with my realtor neighbor without wondering where her little purple backpack-backpack is. 🙂

    19. Margo

      I see this:

      xoxoxoxo55555555xoxoxoxoco555555xoxoxoxo
      right before the para that starts “Thanks for the kreative blog…. I’m reading on your blog in firefox.

      Dora came along right at the tail end at my house. THANK GOODNESS. I think Dora and her ilk are trying to brainwash our children where they will be called forth using a signal sometime in the future.

    21. Heidi

      Your html codes are not in this post, but they are in your previous posts.
      I know my son doesn’t have a hearing problem and yet he must listen to his comp or Wii games really loud. I turn the volume down and as I leave the room, he turns it back up!

    24. anymommy

      I love this, exactly, tone it down, we don’t need that screechy example in this house. The only child louder is my daughter. I need to paste “quiet voices” on my forehead.

    31. Roxane

      Dora kills me! My best friend’s daughter is OBSESSED with her and I can’t imagine why. She drives me totally up a wall. I’m so glad that I’m not the only Dora hater!

    32. Annje

      I am so glad my daughter (3.5) is not really into characters. We don’t have Dora, but what bugs me a little, from what I have seen, is that she is touted as bilingual. From what I can tell, you included more words in Spanish than she uses.

    33. Chandler

      We underwent Dora for a few years, so I know whereof you speak Ann. Although for some reason the screeching didn’t bother me as much as the mind-numbing, soul-crushing repitition. As in, “I’m the map I’m the map I’m the map I’m the map I’m the map I’m the map I’m the map I’m the map! I’m the map! I’m the map! I’m the map! I’m the map. I’m the MAP! And did I mention that I’m the MAP??!!”

      Gaaaaaaaaagggghhhh.

    34. jennygirltherat

      I’M THE MAP I’M THE MAP I’m the MAP I’M the MAP I’m THE Map i’M tHe MAP I”M the MAP i’m themapi’mthemapi’mthemapi’mthemapi’msatani’mthemap I’m the MAP!

    35. A Woman Of No Importance

      Ranting Ann, why is it in all kids’ programmes that they have to SHOUT AND SCREAM – Gahhhhhhhhhhh!

      I loved and so laughed at this post, but I need a dictionary for your Free Association Friday… My bad x

    36. jennygirltherat

      Unintended hilarity: I was in such a hurry to add my 2 cents (see above)that I did not even notice that the comment immediately preceding mine was by my husband. With exactly the same whine, no less. We discovered while chatting at beakfast that we had both posted. I just came back to look at it.