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ChuckECheese Exceededs All Expectations!

    (By TwoPointFive)

    I got to see Chuck E Cheese in real life and not just brought-to-you-by PBSkids.

    Freeloaders jumped on my Teletubbies ride. I gently kicked them off with my chubby feet.

    One girl hip-checked my Mom and I saw her go flying into Barney’s choo-choo. She smiled really hard and went to buy a large beer.

    I also got to see real-live Police.

    They came to settle-down some grown ups at the next table.

    Our birthday boy hid under the table when the staff started singing to him. He put his hands over his ears and turned extremely red.

    Everyone kept asking, and we did not want to hug ChuckE. I slapped him five. It made me feel weirrrrrd.

    I saw babies dancing on tables.

    Two different babies danced on two different tables. They were one-years-old and shook there butts all around like Fergie from The Black Eyed Peas.

    Freeloaders stole cupcakes off our tables. The ones we already bit the frosting off of.

    Nobody could figure out where “that smell” came from.

    Nobody got stuck in the ceiling obstacle course. That’s good, because I don’t know how the hell you’d get out of there.

    All the soap in the bathrooms got used up. Mom started freaking “ucky ucky ucky ucky” and something about a “germ cesspool”

    One grown up played Skiball forever. He was really excited and sweaty. He won tons and tons of tickets. Mom grabbed my arm and led me to the other side of the room.

    My mom drank another really large beer. I stuck my finger in it. WOOT.

    I can’t wait to go back. Mom says its only open for birthday parties and we have to be invited. But I know where it is. It’s right by my preschool…I know what it looks like now.

    ***********************************************************************

    Thank you to Humorpress.com for featuring two of my posts in their April/May humor showcase. “Dear HR Representative” (fka “Dear Lyndsay” a guest post on that Still Very Witty blog) took fifth place and I won $20! “Safety Tips from my MIL” placed as semi-finalist and I won a warm fuzzy feeling. Given that I payed $20 ($10 per entry), this writing career looks about as lucrative as my post-college stage acting career. Meaning I’m still in the hole, and occasionally warm and fuzzy.

    0 thoughts on “ChuckECheese Exceededs All Expectations!”

    1. Chandler

      Two point five, eh? Ann, I hate to tell you but you’re looking at at least nine more years of hearing about the big rat if my eleven is anything to go by.

      But skeeball can be fun….

    3. Christy

      Ceiling obstacle course?

      Ann – your blog still isn’t showing up in my reader, and worse, I’ve clicked on it a couple times from my sidebar today and it says ‘isn’t found’…and it redirected me to a feedburner site with your post on it – but no way to comment there. UGH.

    5. Lyndsay

      If you ever figure out what that smell is …

      Until then, poor Kate will continue to live deprived of the ChuckE experience. A sorry childbood at best.

    9. Rowe

      Hi Ann, thanks for visiting for Joanna’s interview. I have no idea what ChuckE Cheese is, and this does not make me want to go there any time soon! Should I protest loudly if they try to smuggle one into Australia?

    11. hokgardner

      We have been to Chuck-E-Hell exactly once. I hope to never return.

      And I’ve never gotten paid a dime for my blogging, so you’re way ahead of me, even if you are technically in the hole.

    16. Spencer L Casey

      The Chuck E. Cheese that existed when I was a kid was great! All sorts of life threatening devices to play with while your parents were getting thoroughly tanked in the other room. Today, the best stuff is gone and, sniff, so is the beer. Now it’s just a really expensive place to have a kid party.

      Cheers!

      Spencer

    17. Suzy

      I went to a ChuckEcheese with a girlfriend and her kids and I was terrified.

      Congrats on your writing. Very impressive Mrs. Thang!

    20. K

      I took my son there is winter. He absolutely loves it!

      It’s not as scary as I was expecting, but I don’t want to go every week or even every month.

    26. Beth

      You just reminded me of why I have been so happy to NOT have a ChuckE in my podunk town.

      And I would have paid the $10 per writing for you because you are a great writer!

    28. Coffee with Cathy

      My older daughter, mom to my 15-month-old grandson Capt. Adorable, already is regretting the Chuck E. Cheese parties looking in her future. I consider it payback. Grandparenthood is sweet!

    32. Margo

      that “E” stands for evil, little one. I know of one mother, not prone to headaches at all who developed a debilitating cluster migraine that never fully went away.

    35. Hit 40

      Oh my!!! I have similar awful, smelly chucky memories. I think their should be a 5 min pause on the hour. No playing on anything for 5 minutes to help those ass of a parents that can not get their kids to climb off the toys. This would clear some of the craziness out.