Gratitude is the attitude!

Thank you for the white hairs shproinging in my part. I love them so much I have to set them free. Usually out of my car window.

Thank you for my slowing metabolism, for she’s exhausted and requiring of even more calories for her diminished gait.

Thank you for challenging me with names. It’s fun to forget names you’ve known for years! If it weren’t for the growing plaque on my brain, my friends and family would not enjoy my new cheek-pinch and “Oh…you!” greeting.

Thank you for mixing up my family of origin. Again. High time I updated those framed wall collages. Related: Please invent new kitchen condiments because I already needed the salt, pepper, maple syrup, Worcestershire, soy sauce, jam, honey, A-1, half-and-half and the non-dairy creamer to explain my family constellation to my unsuspecting lunch date. And that’s just the parent part of the constellation.

Thank you for that Whistle Baby song on my car radio. I love when my five-year-old sings about fellatio.

Thank you for an allergy season so prolific my running nose keeps me up at night, even though my kids finally sleep through. Plus, with a schnoz like mine, who doesn’t want to make lots of loud repetitive nose-explosions in public?

Thank you for keeping me humble with the easy NYT times crossword puzzles. Yes, I still do them in pen. Still anticipating a NYT-EZ-LITE-XWYRD edition.

All kidding aside, I feel extraordinarily grateful during this season for good health, for my family, for loving friends, for my work and for you dear reader. Thanks for showing up. Happy New Year! It’s a lot like the Chinese new year, only Jewish and nothing like the Chinese new year.

L’Shanah Tovah