Always searching for the good scissors? Tired of Tupperware falling on your head every time you open the cupboard? Need a little organizational motivation? Forget hiring a professional, and find yourself a pooper.
Last week potty training stormed in, and blew me a surge of organizational energy unparalleled since my days of pregnancy nesting. I’ve sorted toys. I’ve reorganized closets, and delivered bins full of hand-me-overs to friends. I’ve even tackled the unused spiced drawer! Correction; I’ve mentally tackled the unused spice drawer.
Husband witnessed my transformation into the Tasmanian Dirt Devil, as I feverishly sorted Duplos from Legos, and matched each Little Person to his or her proper domain. Usually the king of surface clearing, he happily obliged my sorting spasm, mouth slightly agape in wonderment. Why now? Why go fight the barrel of monkeys in the Rubbermaid bunker on such a glorious spring day?
POOP! Poop I tell you.
TwopointFive, he’s doing great. But “great” after week one of potty boot camp suggests perhaps a 70/30 success ratio. Why the Winnie-the-pooh, must the lackluster 30 prove so dirty? And why, aren’t those sordid solids more…solid? Alas, alack, how can one teeny body hold so much?
My motives are so transparent. MAKE ORDER! Control the out-of-control. Subvert the barely containable frustration into a productive cleaning operation. Never has assigning magic marker to coordinating cap felt so gratifying.
Trust me on this one. Hate kids? No problem. Pick up a new puppy! Doesn’t have to be human, it just has to poop. You’ll find yourself cleaning and organizing like never before. Don’t thank me, thank my motivational pooper!
HA! This worked for you huh? Maybe I need to borrow a toddler… and you .. my house is a wreck!
In my experience, I’ve noticed the smaller the body, the bigger the pooh. Makes me shutter each time one of my students doesn’t flush.
I am SO TOTALLY WHISTLIN’
Can you come to my house? I have two dogs that poop quite a bit and lots of drawers, cabinets and closets that need organizing. Please?
So you’re getting everyone’s shit together?
Believe it or not. . .I get the connection. . .
I’m still not quite sure why the poop is motivating you to clean but I’m glad it’s working for you.
Alas, alack! People don’t use that expression nearly enough. 🙂
Glad that there is a silver lining to your potty mania. At least you don’t have to MOVE to get all of it done! 😉
I totally agree….last night, I discovered a poopy diaper nestled under the bed from 2 nights before (we were out of town) that my husband THOUGHT he had thrown out!! AAARGGGGHHHH!!!
My daughter is 22 months, I guess I got a while to go.
I don’t know if you are into these things, but I have something waiting for you at my blog!
The best thing about this post is that you used the word “Alack”… and that you said poop or pooper six times. YAY!
G.C.
This writing piece has quite a nice rhythm. I think I could dance to it.
That’s weird… Kiddie poop has me running for the hills not sorting out LEGO!!
Oh, I think Freud would have had a field day with this one. “Vhat does Meez Mommy’s kuleenink compulshun haf to do wit bowul moofments??”
Pooping = cleaning? Sorry, not in my world. In my world NOTHING = Cleaning!!!
That pisses me off. I wanna clean but I poop then need a nap!!!
I’m having flash backs to six months ago. Shudder. Potty training sucks.
Organizing? Poop! I don’t even have time for cleaning up poop, let alone organizing anything more than my bra cups, one on each boob.
Must be Poop Week. We’re all stinky over at my blog too. You’ll not want to miss out on it, cuz poop is that special.
I’m an angry cleaner. When I’m angry, I clean. I swear sometimes my husband pisses me off just to get some housework out of me. If that didn’t piss me off so much, I’d refuse.