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Rude Awakenings

    I.

    TwoPointFive: (5:30 AM) That your earbwow?

    Me: Yes, that’s my eyebrow.

    TwoPointFive: It’s biggg?

    Me: Uh. I guess.

    TwoPointFive: Inspector Gadget?

    II.

    I had the pleasure of a phone call from Suzy last week. She shared with me her wart wisdom. Well, its actually Louise Hay’s wart wisdom.

    I have tiny expressions of anger all over my hands. I know, I know, the more you learn about me, the hotter I get!

    Later that same evening I had a drink with Amy who shared with me her wart cure; Wish them away! So first I must identify the source of my anger, and then wish my tiny angry friends away. Only then might my hands look less Yoda-like.

    Incidentally, one of my Sunday School teachers growing up reminded me so much of Yoda. Well, a Caucasian female Yoda. Huh. She must not have wished very hard. I’m having difficulty concentrating my wishing just on the warts. As I meditate I begin hording wishes for my moles, zits, and wrinkles. I’ll let you know how things progress. Maybe I’ll post a wart watch.

    III.

    Everyone seems to be multiple-blogging these days. I can barely keep up with just one. I feel like a pre-sexual revolution-1950s housewife.

    At least I’m truly the master of my own domain now. Find me at www.annsrants.com !

    0 thoughts on “Rude Awakenings”

    1. Louise Hay is the BEST! Her’s is the inspiration I us for my 2nd blog. Don’t hate.

      Good luck on the warts.
      Next time take of your disguise before you go to sleep so as not to confuse the little people

    2. Your 2.5 is the best! Miss those years. The bold innocence. As far as the warts and the giant brows, Elphaba, is that you? Wrong skin tone, I guess.

      Ugh, too early

      Two blogs? Are you kidding me? Guess I’m June Cleaver as well. I mean, one piece of chocolate cake is awesome. Eating the whole thing would just be torture. OK, bad analogy.

      Cheers! Have a great week.

    3. You definately are the ruler of your universe and your blog….bushy brows, warts, drinks AND telephone calls.

      I’m in awe. 🙂

    4. Master of my domain was the title of my very first post. I have great notalgia for that.

      I am doing to multi-thing. But only because I started a silly site on a whim and now feel kind of responsible for the upkeep, and because I’m not liking the hodgepodge style my “official” blog has been sporting lately (so I started a new site for the “pretties”). Plus I want to have a separate one for my son’s special needs stuff.

      I was telling Chris (my husband) that I’m like that In Living Color skit with the Jamaicans and all of their jobs. I’ve got 8 blogs mon! I may have to write about that…

    5. By the way – you’ve got some weird coding stuff going on… But maybe that’s intentional. I don’t always get all of the the “blog speak”. So maybe it’s a lot of code like “LOL” and “IRL” and all that.

    6. I once sold a wart for 35 cents. Absolutely true. A guy gave me 35 cents for my wart and in the morning it was gone.

      Never found it.

      I believe it now has multiple blogs.

      (I know! What’s up with the ability to have several of them?! I can barely handle my own!)

      Pearl

    7. I’m with you, one blog is all I can handle. When I was working for Scrivel.com and Uproar.com I thought I was going to lose my mind.

    8. Oh, I just read about a home remedy for warts and have been trying to find a sufferer to try it out. But then I read Mike’s comment and he totally blew it for me.

      Although he did fail to say that you have to keep the duct tape on for a really long time. So don’t expect it to work after a couple days.

    9. If you get some good remedies for warts, pass them on. When I was little I had literally hundreds – eek! (when I told my husband this, he was curious as to why I had saved that bit of info until after we were married). But seriously, anger? do you think there is a connection?

      good luck with that!

    10. Mike is right, Ann..duct tape…for the warts…as for the eyebrows? I would say that is not recommended…

      Multiple blogs? I have enough trouble faking one!

      Peace – Rene

      Thanks for FAF! It was fun!

    11. On the topic of cruel skin afflictions: How come no one ever told us that there would come a time in our lives when we would be forced to endure the indignity of pimples AND wrinkles simultaneously? What kind of effed up sense of humor must the Divine have to make this possible?

      Honestly…

    12. Yeah, man…what the heck is up with the multiple blogs. If I ever want to hit up someone’s profile, do ’em a solid and comment on their blog, but then up comes 4 or 5 blogs, which one am I supposed to pick? I don’t have time to go through each one to figure out which one is their primary. Ugh.

    13. The duct tape trick really does work. It might make you look a little freakish for a few days but those warts will just disappear.